Wednesday, February 6, 2008

CD21: And, we're out of the gates!


I never thought this day would arrive. I've sat poised for so long ready to jockey my race horse full speed ahead only to be told time and time again "Not yet." But today the bullhorn has blown and the gates flew wide open.

As I surge forward, blinders on, kicking up dirt, toward the baby finish line, it's first important to note that my long and torturous wait for zero has come to an end. After 11 weeks, my HCG is finally negative. Now, because this is the wacky world of infertility, today is like "opposites day." Picture this: I walk backwards, I love chocolate ice cream instead of vanilla, I go uptown instead of downtown, I am tall instead of short, and of course, most importantly, I must switch my brain from wanting a negative beta to longing for a positive one. 

Now that I have this clean slate, another important change has occurred. Falling on the same day as this beta, I was allowed to also do my CD21 test. I'm in a bit of shock that my nurse's phone call is actually informing me of good news. All is well in uterus land and I've gotten the green light to start lupron. 

So I am taking the reigns, even to the point where I will be doing this first shot tonight by myself. I wish I could say I'm doing this because of a new sense of empowerment, but it's really because my husband is away on a business trip and what choice do I have? But point being, I will be putting aside my wimpy squeamish self to break out that first needle (luckily the smallest one) and on the count of 3 - one...two...three! - I will do the deed with my very own hands. IVF#3 is finally beginning and I'm ready. 

8 comments:

Fertilize Me said...

OH YAH!! Congrats on opposite day! This is all excellent news (except hubby gone and doing your own shot - which I have done before But I am not a big fan of).. Glad new things are on the horizons

Duck said...

Good luck with the self medicating today, glad that there is an all clear in the land of the uterus,(yea for good news)

Melanie said...

And she's off! Isn't it wonderful to be doing something, anything to get this show on the road? I'm glad you're there Miss Opposite. And I love your blog.

Rita said...

fingers crossed.

luna said...

hooray! sometimes a little forward motion is what we need to make us feel a little better. so glad you're on your way.... ~luna

Mrs.X said...

I love opposite day - best of luck and don't worry about the Lupron shot. It was by far the easiest of them all for me. Good luck!

TABI said...

Thank you for the well wishes on my start! I got through the solo lupron shot just fine. I felt like such a beginner while doing it - like it was my first very time doing IVF (awww, nostalgia), but of course as we all know I'm a semi-veteran with this, but needles still give me the butterflies!

Ahuva Batya said...

Hurray! Congratulations on everything coming together. I'm excited for your first day, and hope the needle isn't too painful!